20 Facts About Me

Normally, people do this on instagram. Since i don't have an instagram account but my friends keep telling me to make one so they could tag me, and since i still don't find the urge to make one, i decide to just do this on my blog. Yeah, here it goes...

1. I'm a food enthusiast. I love to eat,

2. that's a sole reason i took Food Technology as my sub-major in college.

3. And since i love to eat THAT much, i'm "forced" to also love cooking.

4. As much as i love food, actually i'm a picky eater.

5. I once wanted to own a company that produces healthy instant noodle.

6. I'm 21 yo and still enjoy reading "Hai, Miiko!".

7. I love singing! I unconsciously hum and mumble every single time i hear any song that i know being played at the radio, TV, or even supermarket.

7. I love all songs in: all Sara Bareilles's album, Maroon 5's It Wont Be Soon Before Long and Linkin Park's Meteora.

8. I still drink milk from a strawed-bottle every morning.

9. My siblings are my biggest motivation in life.

10. When i walk together with my first younger sister, people are often mistaken me as the younger one because my sister is way bigger than me.

11. A pajamas that i used to wear when i was 15 yo still fits me until now.

12. I almost always cry over a cheesy comedy-romantic-drama.

13. I give 100% of my self in everything i do, so when it comes to love, once i fall, i fall hard. THAT hard.

14. I listen more than i speak. I think some of my friends consider me as a good listener (am I right?)

15. I do hold grudge and i have a trouble letting go of the past. Still trying to fix this one, tho.

16. I'm a die hard procrastinator HAHAHA.

17. I get distracted sooo easily.

18. I want to tie a knot with someone in 24 or 25, and i hope that someone is an engineer fufufu.

19. I can't stand manly guy with passion (esp in sports and engineering), pointed nose, and eargasm voice :")

20. I'm still figuring out what i really want to do in life.

I still have a long list of facts to add actually (does it make me some kind of narcissist?), but they say it must be twenty. I have several people in my mind to be tagged, but since it's a blog i could't tag any. So that's it. Toodles!

Friend

I always thought that nobody knew my self as best as I did, that in this process of discovering who I really am the only person I should listen to was my own self.

But today I found out that some particular people proved me wrong. That at some point in life, it took talking with those particular people to really figure out things about my self.

I always thought that the only person that really cared about my problem was me my self. That it's every man for him self world out there. That nobody wanted to listen to me, blurting out about the crap that has something to do only with my life. 

But then again today, those some particular people proved me wrong. They listened, as if my story was worth paying attention to.

These particular people are a gift, from God, called friend.

Pesan Dari Pulau Jawa

untuk kawan di Pulau Borneo yang baru menginjak usia 23 tahun

PS: please pardon the illegible handwriting

Cause I Can't, If You Don't

Adele - Adele - I Cant Make You Love M .mp3

Found at bee mp3 search engine

"I will feel the power but you won't, no you won't
Cause I can't make you love me when you don't
I'll close my eyes then I don't see
The love you don't feel when you're holding me
Morning will come and I'll do what's right

Just give me till then to give up this fight

And I will give up this fight"

After all, I'm just a juvenile who's trapped in a 21 years old flesh.

Just Awake - Fear, and Loathing In Las Vegas

The only metal core/screamo (or whatever the genre is) song that i've ever put into my playlist. 

Devastation

Have you ever felt so useless?
Have you ever felt so stuck that any movement you make is bringing you nowhere?
Have you ever felt so left behind while everyone else is busy catching up with their own world?
Have you ever watched someone you love being in trouble and you can't do nothing to help them?
Have you ever failed so many times you start to consider your self as a loser?
Have you ever felt so desperate you don't know what to do with your shitty life?
Have you ever felt so sick of the same solace you've been feeding yourself, like suddenly you realize it's all a cliche?
Have you ever felt so tired of believing?
Have you ever waited too long you start to wonder whether it's the right thing to wait?
Have you ever wished for something that never comes true you start to lose hope?
Have you ever felt fed up of being relentlessly asked to hold on?
Have you ever felt you just want to curl up in bed and cry at your fate all day?
Have you ever felt so scared and insecure and mad at the same time?
Have you ever wanted to be asleep through weeks because reality is a painful thing to wake up to?
Have you ever wanted to escape from your tedious and dull life?
Have you ever wanted to kvetch so bad but you hold back because you know that everyone else is tired of hearing the very same complaint from your mouth?
Have you ever hated your self for being so weak? and effete? and useless? and obtuse? and useless? and inane? and useless?

Cause I have. In fact, those are how i feel right now.