Devastation

Have you ever felt so useless?
Have you ever felt so stuck that any movement you make is bringing you nowhere?
Have you ever felt so left behind while everyone else is busy catching up with their own world?
Have you ever watched someone you love being in trouble and you can't do nothing to help them?
Have you ever failed so many times you start to consider your self as a loser?
Have you ever felt so desperate you don't know what to do with your shitty life?
Have you ever felt so sick of the same solace you've been feeding yourself, like suddenly you realize it's all a cliche?
Have you ever felt so tired of believing?
Have you ever waited too long you start to wonder whether it's the right thing to wait?
Have you ever wished for something that never comes true you start to lose hope?
Have you ever felt fed up of being relentlessly asked to hold on?
Have you ever felt you just want to curl up in bed and cry at your fate all day?
Have you ever felt so scared and insecure and mad at the same time?
Have you ever wanted to be asleep through weeks because reality is a painful thing to wake up to?
Have you ever wanted to escape from your tedious and dull life?
Have you ever wanted to kvetch so bad but you hold back because you know that everyone else is tired of hearing the very same complaint from your mouth?
Have you ever hated your self for being so weak? and effete? and useless? and obtuse? and useless? and inane? and useless?

Cause I have. In fact, those are how i feel right now.